Even till when clock will stop ticking, not all relationships will last long or lead to marriage and of course even if it leads to marriage, there’s no guarantee there won’t be a divorce. In other words, having an ex or exes will continue to abound.
Truth is, as we grow in life, we get exposed and tend to meet different people at various points. While we may be glad for meeting some or a particular person, conversely, others can be filled with regret.
The question is, how does one totally forget about the person after a break up? Well, it’s established that one of the easy ways to get someone off mind is by stop seeing the person. This is why some people prefer to get rid of the person’s images either by burning the hard copy photographs or deleting completely the soft copies from their devices and as well as blocking on all social media platforms.
In all of these, the following are 5 types of exes (those you have dated before) which you may not find it easy to totally forget about. In no particular order, let’s check it out.
Church member
Dating a church member is fun as you both tend to flow well together spiritually and romantically. In fact, dating a fellow church member gives one peace of mind. This is because you feel comfortable around the person having known a lot about him/her via the church way even before dating.
In general, you feel at home with the person since you both are in same religious belief and see nothing to worry about. While the going may be sweet, it could be difficult breaking up.
However, even if you are able to break up, deleting or forgetting totally about the person may be a herculean. It is simple. Each time you are in church, or may be the next church activity crosses your mind, what follows immediately is your ex. Consequently, so many other thoughts come in too such as if he/she will also be in church, what if you both happens to sit next to each other and the pastor says “turn to your neighbour, shake and smile at him/her”, what are the church members even saying about you guys since the break up?
All these add up and get you worried making it difficult to totally forget about the person. In reality, some people can’t even stand the heat and the best option to them is to quit the church or parish/branch.
First love
Let me quickly ask you a question. How did your first love go? Except it wasn’t genuine, I’m sure till today he or she still crosses your mind.
Now although not only attributed to women, but women tend to attach so much love and emotion to the first man they ever dated. This is why they count so much on the man having been the one who deflowered them. They can’t love the man less and even when there’s a break up, they don’t easily get over it and move on. Men on the other hand equally don’t find it easy to forget about the first woman they dated. They attach so much feelings to the woman and even after break up, the memories stay back.
Dating a neighbour
So many benefits come with dating a neighbour. For the guys, in a country like Nigeria where girls bill guys so much on transportation fare, dating a neighbour would automatically save you the stress of keeping transport money on every visit. She can easily stroll in and stroll back to her place (if she so wishes) at no cost. But apart from the transport aspect, so many other benefits come with it such as easy accessibility, close monitoring and observation of his/her lifestyle, possible assistance when in need e.g. if he or she has information that NEPA people are in the street, he or she can quickly run down to your place to help you change over from the “bypass”. Just so many benefits.
However, this kind of love is mostly sweet when the two are genuinely in love with each other as it comes with a lot of drama. Conversely, if it’s not genuine, it’s advisable not to even start in the first place. At break up, it’s usually very difficult to forget him or her. Why? You tend to bump into him/her on daily basis. Whether you stroll out to fetch/buy water, you bump into him/her. You rush out to get pepper from the nearby shop, you bump into him/her. You are taking fresh air in front of your compound, you see him/her passing. And unlike before, when NEPA people are in the street, he/she would be the one leading them to your place to show the bypass so they can disconnect your light. This kind of lifestyle may continue unending and until one of you relocates from the area. In submission, it’s usually difficult to forget about a neighbour you were once dating.
Colleague at work
Office romance is usually discouraged and frowned at mostly because of its negative implications but colleagues in different offices have continued to go into it regardless. While it has its merits and demerits in terms of work productivity and even beyond, it’s always difficult when break up begins to surface. Imagine breaking up with a colleague whom you’ll come back to the office tomorrow and every other day to see again? It could be difficult to think less of the person and also traumatizing psychologically. Consequently, some people find it difficult to manage the situation and they either resign or apply for transfer (if possible) so they can stop seeing that face, hence possible to get him/her off their their mind.
Another negative part is that after the break up, the colleague may be bringing in his/her new partner to the office to play romance such as deep hugging and kissing right in front of you. Take it or not, seeing them in such mood can never guarantee you peace of mind. Therefore, it’s better you quit the job or apply for transfer.
Course mate in school
Generally dating while in university is fun and is seen as part of social life on campus but imagine falling in love with a course mate from first year in the university. Except such lasts for the whole period (4, 5 or 6 years as the case may be), it could be challenging moving on if it ends prematurely. This is why this can be likened to dating a colleague in office. Breaking up with a course mate in school means you’d still come back tomorrow and every other day throughout the time being to see the same face which makes it difficult to get him/her off your mind. In some occasions based on lecturer’s arrangement, you both may happen to sit next to each other in lecture or exam hall. What’s going to happen?
Conclusion
It’s important to look before you leap. Put in perspective the merits and demerits of what the relationship is going to bring before going into it. Some might be very difficult breaking up even when it’s necessary to.
