Historians say that among the Kamba (also Akamba) people of Eastern Kenya, there were widowed wives, as there are anywhere else.
The Kamba people of the Bantu ethnic tribe live in the semi-arid land called Ukambani, encompassing modern-day communities of Makueni County, Kitui County, and Machakos County in Kenya.
According to Dr. Paul M. Kyalo, a sociologist at Kenyatta University, it was a traditional custom for women to
marry men who had long passed. According to research he cites in his paper, the purpose of ghost marriages was to preserve the chain of life.
“If a son dies before he has married, the parents arrange for him to be married in absentia; so that th
e dead man is not cut off from the chain of life which is supreme and most important,” he explains.
Historians say this type of traditional union in Kikamba was called Kuungamia Isyitwa (literal translation: preserve the name of the dead man). Marriage was a must and every adult and normal ‘mukamba’ (male) had to marry as a sign of personal importance.
It is believed that every mukamba wife had a spirit husband whose job was to make sure that she conceived. In the case of ghost marriages, the dead man was the spirit husband to the woman.
So what was the process for securing a wife for a dead man? “The parents of the dead man looked for a girl, proposed to the girl’s family, and if they accepted, paid the bride’s gifts and took the bride home to her ghost husband.
The family of the dead son took care of the girl and looked for a genitor for her. The children born of thi
s union assume the dead man’s name,” Kyalo explains.
Some cases were more cunning: “An aunt was sent to seduce a girl on behalf of the dead boy who they want to remember. She had to land a cute woman who would marry a dead man who she has never set an eye on but is made to believe exists.
The normal procedure of paying the dowry is respected and a sperm donor is secretly hired to have childr
en with the woman. The children belong to the dead boy.” Some say the tradition is no longer practiced but there exist widowed wives who were married to dead men.