Back in the day, marriage was taken more seriously than today. Parents groomed their children with a direct motive of getting married at a certain age.
This meant giving extra time to the children, most especially girls, to be good wives and mothers.
However, today people start dating or hook up while at school, night clubs or pubs, in taxis or buses and probably move in w
ithout their parents’ knowledge. Girls in Buganda were given extra preparation for marriage to avoid disappointments and breakups.
According to Charles Lwanga Busuulwa, a ceremonial spokesperson, at the age of 15, girls were taken to the paternal aunt’s (ssenga) homes for training.
“Away from the general conduct, love and respect, there are certain rituals paternal aunts perform for girls to become real women. While at the aunt’s place, a girl is taught about the good and bad side of ma
rriage, how to deal with marital issues and then cautioned to be resilient in case of challenges,” he says.
“The kitchen and bedroom habits are vital aspects during the ssenga’s training,” mentions Annet Nandujja, a commercial ssenga and counsellor. After the training, the bride’s parents along with the family elders would start looking for a man to marry their girl.
This is after they are well-informed about the behaviour and background of a certain family that they wished to relate with.
The search for a husband or wife was headed by elders from both the bride and groom’s family but the proposal came from the man’s side. Apart from the
elders, the girl had no hand in the preparation or discussions whatsoever, according to Busuulwa.